Friday, October 4, 2019

A Baseball...

Inspired by my summer working on the Syracuse Mets radio broadcasts, listening to PxP man Mike Tricarico describe the  actions of a baseball.
............................

According to the rulebook, a baseball is a sphere formed by yarn wound around a small core of cork, rubber or similar material, covered with two strips of white horsehide or cowhide, tightly stitched together. It shall weigh not less than five nor more than 5¼ ounces avoirdupois and measure not less than nine nor more than 9¼ inches in circumference.

It is rubbed up,

then

PITCHED,

Backdoored, changed-up, chucked, cookied, curved, dealt, delivered, doctored, emery-balled, eephused, fire-balled, flame-thrown, fork-balled, four-seamed, front-doored, gassed, high-cheesed, hosed, hurled, juiced, knuckled, lobbed, lolipopped, meatballed, overhanded, palm-balled, port-sided, quick-pitched, rainbowed, shine-balled, side-armed, sinkered, slidered, southpawed, split-fingered, submarined, spitballed, two-seamed, Uncle Charlied, yackered, yellow-hammered, whipped, whistled.

and unless it is, chased, fanned, missed, taken, waved at, whiffed,  K’d
it might be

swung on
and

HIT

Baltimore-chopped, banged, bashed, belted, blasted, blooped, bunted, chopped, clobbered, clubbed, cranked, creamed, crushed, cued, daisy-cuttered, dribbled driven, dumped, dunked, dying-quailed, fisted, flared, lied, flipped, fouled, frozen-roped, gapped, hacked, hammered, hooked, humpback-linered, gapped, grounded,  ground-rule-doubled, jerked, knocked, laced, lasered, lifted, lined, lofted, looped, lost, mashed, nubbed, pasted, poked, popped, power-alleyed, punched, ripped, rocked, rolled, roped, served, skied, slapped, sliced, smacked, smashed, smoked, sprayed, suicide-squeezed, squibbed, stroked, tagged, tapped, tattooed, Texas-Leagured, topped, torched, walloped, worm-burnered, zingered.

And then, maybe

CAUGHT,
backhanded, barehanded, circus-caught, flagged, gloved, nabbed, run down, snagged, tracked-down, snowconed, speared,

THEN
Fired, flung, gunned, relayed, rifled, tossed, underhanded, whipped, "wung,"
Or… badly… air-mailed, badly-thrown, misfired, overthrown, underthrown, wildly-thrown,

And sometimes they are
bad-hopped, Bucknered, butchered, bobbled, booted, dropped, erred, fumbled, kicked, miscued, misplayed, missed, muffed,


BUT MAYBE,

dingered, downtowned, four-masted, gone-yarded gophered, jacked, moonshot, outta-hered, outta-sighted, parked, round-trippered, salamied, short-porched, tape-measured, tatered, upper tanked,

Ballantine-blasted, Eutah-Streeted Green-Monstered, Greenberg-Gardened, Kiner-Kornered, McCovey-Coved, Monument-Parked, Pesky-Poled, Uecker-seated

and long-gone.

Card, 2019

Sunday, January 27, 2019

Pitchers and Catchers, 2019

A friend of mine reminded me that pitchers and catchers report in about three weeks, so…


Pitchers and Catchers, 2019

 There is something magic
 about the change of the calendar
 from January to February.

 There is still the pile of snow in the driveway
 and the mound of boots
 and gloves
 and scarves
 and knit caps
 next to the front door,­­­
 and the snow blower
 stands silent sentinel in the garage.

 But once the calendar changes
 it is a mere two weeks
 until pitchers and catchers report,
 and that, my friends,
 is a moment to be savored.

 The proverbial light at the end of the tunnel
 breaks through the gloom of winter,
 and the muscle memory
 of bleacher seats warmed by the sun
 revives our spirits.

 We lean forward as if to hear
 the leather-meeting-leather POP
 of the spring training fastball,
 and everything sensory about the game returns.

The familiar rhythms and rituals
 unique to the ballpark
 play out in our memory,
 a smile breaks through,
 and a contented sigh follows,
 as February moves into the lineup,
 and January takes a seat on the bench.

 Herm Card, 2019